From Your Belly

Stop Calling Me a Pregnant Woman

My Master once entered a phase
That whenever I would see him
He would say,

"Hafiz, How did you ever become a pregnant woman?"

And I would reply,
"Dear Attar, You must be speaking the truth,
But all of what you say is a mystery to me."

Many months passed by in his blessed company.
But one day I lost my patience
Upon hearing the odd refrain And blurted out,

"Stop calling me a pregnant woman!"

And Attar replied,
"Someday, my sweet Hafiz,
All that nonsense in your brain will dry up
Like a stagnant pool of water
Beneath the sun,

Though if you want to know the Truth
I can so clearly see that God has made love with you
And the whole universe is germinating
Inside your belly

And wonderful words,
Such enlightening words
Will take birth from you

And be cradled against thousands
Of hearts."

- Hafiz, The Gift
translated by Daniel Ladinsky

May the encroaching nonsense in all of us
be blessed to dry up like a stagnant pool
under the sun
so that we may finally truly see
the truth of who and what we are...

Like Hafiz, spirit has made love to each of us
Our gifts germinating inside our bellies
Our connection to the whole universe is within us -
our truth, our words, our beauty.
When we birth and share this with the world
it too will be cradled against thousands of hearts...


What are you birthing? What lives inside your belly growing, waiting to come out? How do you feel the universal truth, stories, love, beauty inside you?

Declare!

I stand here today on my path of present
and still feel the threads of past paths intertwining.
Ancestral paths
of mother, grandmother, mother of hers and mother of hers
and all sisters and aunts
still speaking their stories through tuggings at the back of my heart.
Their stories speak of worry for me,
that I am not partnered, not married, not a mother
and speak their known rule that these things come first.
I speak back, forcefully voice with feet planted in present
that it is now a new way.
My path comes first...

I thank my mother's anger and frustration (as I perceived)
at being tied to what felt to her as a small life
filled with too much to do - caring for children, home, family, is an infinite job.
She needed something else
and I felt her fire and resentment many days.
I thank this fire for it ignited the flame within my spirit
to burn through the trappings to find another way.
Another way to honor my own unique path,
to give space for all my gifts,
to honor my feminine and womanhood.
Another way to commit to partnership
without surrendering my passions, goals, freedoms, adventure, growth.
I have a fire inside that was fed by the fire of my mother...

And it burns against the fire of my ancestors
who tell me to follow their old way,
to accept the oppression that burned or buried their own fires.

I declare my path today
with roots outside myself into the earth
and allow the tears of fear from hearing the echoing of my grandmothers,
their stories worrying my heart
that I am cutting off from what they had - partner, family, child.
I console my weeping heart,
I embrace my righteous soul honoring path,
cradle my spirit in warrior arms and explain my truth,
that it is not an either or,
it is not path or family, sacrificing one for the other.
Rather these are one - simultaneously fed,
growing as one.

This is the new way,
though I do not know how this journey will unfold...
- a new path yet to tread.

One Voice

My voice reaches out from my heart, extended through throat, emerging through mouth to speak and let go words unfolding from my fisted hand, now open to reveal (expose) the wisdom scraping to be heard. My voice is but one voice, and my voice is the reverberation of the web of women's voice, of the feminine strength, of earth wisdom, of all that I can hear and to which I relate.

In my own humanity I have struggled with the story of the worth of my voice, struggled to believe that my words were worth hearing. Searching through echoes of devaluation in my own lifetime, in the collective past and throughout the present web of sisterhood, I find a cord of truth that shines a light on the essential value of sharing as reflection, as common story, catalysing wisdom. I have let go of layers of suppression to embrace the opportunity given me... the freedom to speak, the power to express. I take up this charge granted to me as a well educated free western woman to speak all that I can hear that does not have opportunity to be said. For the women who are not granted the teachings to read and write, for all girls and women enslaved, all feminine that is shrouded, hidden, locked away, for all voices murdered and tortured to be quieted, for all voices mute in order to survive.

I find my strength daily in owning that my story is but a piece of what is essential to the whole. My expression is only a minuscule part of the universe and has the power to speak the truth of universal story that many are barred from sharing. In remembering that there are billions of stories that make the whole, my deep desire arises to hear, to know, to bring to consciousness, these stories: the billions of stories that are being lived by women in places so different and far from mine yet with parallel roots extending in the same direction, deep to the center of the earth.

Women and girls of the world, I want to know your story, your piece. Your struggles reflect the challenges on our path, your joys reflect the strides and peace of our evolution, your confusion reflects our places of growth. And all our stories speak of the story of humanity and the story of our universe, past and present, to awaken the future.

I want to speak my piece. I want to share my voice. I want to honor my part. And so I want to know intimately all the threads of our woven fabric.
What helps you rise in the morning from the ground where you sleep in Africa, and what do you do first in your day? What are your thoughts as you move and your feelings with each encounter? Where does your body hurt dear sisters in the Middle East, India, China, Russia? Who and what makes you smile during the day and what do you wish for your children? As you live your day in Cambodia, Vietnam, Indonesia, Thailand, Laos, what helps you feel good? What brings your heart to race with fear and what are your 3 grand wishes for today? Mothers and sisters of South America and Central America, where are you most safe? When does your heart ache and what for, and where do you find God or spirit today? I want to know your stories and I'm happy to share with you mine.

I wish to strengthen the power of the fierce wise feminine - the graceful nurturing essential feminine - through fervent courageous womanhood, energizing healing and extending to initiate the next generations, by deeply listening and boldly expressing one voice at a time - our one voice of all.